Thank God, Derek's back.

The girls are beautiful to look at and the new kid yesterday was OK but Derek D is the best you've got. And no, we're not related nor have I rec'd any large checks lately. Marc M.

on a future episode... "A man from Ohio was arrested for having sex with an Audi R8. The man elegidly broke into an Audi dealer ship, pried open the gas tank, and was apprehended fornicating with the R8 a few minutes later. Authorities are unsure of what to charge him with on top of breaking and entering and vandalism, but Audi officials claim they want him 'to serve the maximum' penalty. No news yet on the sentence or a child. I'm DerekD, it wasn't me, and this is Fast Lane Daily."Hopefully we never have to see this day, and I wonder if they would discount the R8...

hahaha, id have sex with this car. i love how this talked about everything but the audi's that hes standing with